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The Last Time I Did Acid I Went Insane and other favorites (2001) (​$​8)

by Jeffrey Lewis

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1.
2.
02:25
3.
02:34
4.
5.
6.
01:44
7.
8.
9.
09:25
10.
03:02

credits

released September 3, 2001

Mostly written by Jeffrey Lewis / LightningLewis Music / ASCAP. Tracks 2 and 8 by Jack Lewis.

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Jeffrey Lewis New York, New York

Native New Yorker Jeffrey Lewis is a comic book writer/artist and a musician.  Jeffrey Lewis and his band tour the world, mixing folk with noise and sharing stages with the likes of Stephen Malkmus, The Mountain Goats, and more. Jeffrey has had albums on Rough Trade since 2001, his comic Fuff has been running since 2004, and he's been featured by NPR, The History Channel, The NY Times and more. ... more

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Track Name: Seattle
Fighting for survival is such a boring Battle
Want to get into my car
I wanna drive out to Seattle
Where the used record stores
Have much better prices
But I don't have a car
And I don't have a license

Should I take another trip to the DMV
Get another learners permit with a picture of me
I'd put it in my wallet
Along with my four dollars
And the condom that's still in there
That has probably expired
I'd leave home for New York
But New York is where I'm from
I'm just looking for a way
To feel my life has begun

Living in the city
Where I'm working like a walrus
But I don't need your money
Man I'm gonna be an artist
Feeling like I wanna do whatever
I feel inside
Put it down on paper
And I'll hope that people buy it

And my only minor worry
Is how to pay the rent
But that won't even matter
When I lose my apartment
Then I'll really have no worries
I'll be just like a cassette
That you've taped up the tabs up
To put something new on it
And when I hit record
God only knows what I will be
And if there is no god
Then it's a better mystery

Fighting for survival and I guess I must Be winning
And my story is so long
I can't remember the beginning
Am I an optimist
Or am I a pessimist
If I see a half empty half full cup
Is half full
Of nothingness.
Track Name: The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song
Walkin' up 23rd street
I was tired and alone
it was late and my housemate
would be asleep when I got home
the sign ahead glowin' red
said the Chelsea Hotel
where Nancy and Syd Vicious
and my friend Dave once dwelled

the street was black under my feet
which continued their walkin'
though I was vaguely interested
in the folks behind me talkin'
two guys maybe gay
wearing raver type suits
and a girl wearing glasses
who looked kinda cute
her hair was short and curly
she had a tattoo on her back
which i could see 'cause her red shirt
was sleeveless with straps
but I only saw this later
not in my first glance
but I could hear her talkin behind me
and as if by chance
she was tryin' to describe
a song I knew well
the Leonard Cohen song
about the Chelsea Hotel

and I smiled a smile to myself
when she said
that was the song where he talked about
someone giving him head
on the bed was unmade
and how the song was outrageous
and that's when I got
uncharacteristically courageous
I could left the three of them laughin'
and just gone on home
but i turned and i faced her
and i said Leonard Cohen?
.....just like that....

She was shocked and surprised
but she looked very happy
that she now had a witness
to back up her story
she looked at me
with her spectacled eyes
and said "see i told u"
to the two others guys

my tale might have ending right there and then
but we started talkin' about Leornard Cohen
how his lyrics were cool
and how he sang so sincere
it must have been true
and it happened right here
usually women right of the bat
don't find me that great
but there we were laughin', strollin'
like we could really releate
although we didn't mention the head line
it was alluded
and the conversation was better
'cause her friends were not included
the guys were more into each other
at least that's how it seemed to me
I heard the faint knocking of opportunity
Although it's easy for me now
upon my looking back
to think of all the things
I could have said
to make me the mac
just keep the sad truth in mind
as i tell this to you
that we really only talked
for a minute or two
and I never got her name
and she never got mine
but in those couple short minutes
we had a pretty good time

And on top of that
though you may not believe it
What she says to me next?
I'll repeat it
that line about getting a blow job
that Leonard sings...
she said it made her
want to do naughty things!
right about then
I should have asked
if she knew
what the Chelsea charged
if we got a room for two
but I didn't and I know
I'm a schmuck, don't you doubt it
the only thing I did
was write this stupid song about it

if I was Leonard Cohen
or some other song writing master
I'd know to first get the oral sex
and then write the song after
you can practise writing songs
about romance every day
but if you haven't loved
then you'll have nothing to say
we could have given each other head
on Leonard's same unmade bed
but I was too shy to suggest it
and so instead
when the three of them stopped
to look through a pub window
I said good night
though I hadn't quite meant to
and waved as we walked though
I would not forget her
especially 'cause she mysteriously said
"see you later"

Now every time I'm walking
I hope that we'd meet
and on purpose
I always go up 23rd street
where the sign glowin' red
says the Chelsea Hotel
where Nancy and Syd Vicious
and my friend drug dealer Dave once dwelled
Life doesn't work out
the way it does in old songs
that's why we sing new ones
to say what really goes on
so if I ever see her again
and we pick up
right we we ended
maybe I'll play her this song
and maybe she won't get too offended

and listen I'll tell you why
there's more than this situation
than meets the eye.
you may think it's sad
you may think it's pathetic
that I sing this song
and that she will never know it
but if you think a minute about what that means
then you'll realise it's actually a wonderful thing
that all around the world
there maybe folks singin' tunes
for the love of others folks
they barely knew
and it puts a smile on my face
yes, it do
and let me tell you
you ought to be smillin too
cause the next time you're feelin'
kinda lonesome and blue
just think that someone somewhere
might be singing about you
who knows if I'll ever see her again
maybe we'll see
this whole time she could have been singing about me
probably not
but it could be
Track Name: Heavy Heart
You say you got a heavy heart
You say you got a heavy heart
You say you got a heavy heart
And its hard for you to start
Carrying your heavy old heart

You say you got a heavy load
You say you got a heavy load
You say you got a heavy load
Walking down the road
Carrying your heavy old heart

And you sure dont know, where you're going
Sure dont know, where you're going
Sure dont know, where you're going

But I say
The sun dont know, when its glowing
The flower dont know, when its growing
The river dont know, when its flowing

You're doing better than you know
You're doing better than you know
Track Name: The Last Time I Did Acid I Went Insane
It was a night in July, I think six years ago
Why did I eat the acid? I don't know
I wasn't thinking and I wasn't scared
Why did I eat the acid? I wasn't prepared
The last time I did acid I went insane

I was hanging with some friends just getting loaded
When all of a sudden my mind exploded
I had a flash that I was gay and I got paranoid
I was sitting on the floor listening to Pink Floyd
The last time I did acid I went insane

And I was drawing crazy pictures and before I was done
The pictures started pulsing like an alien lung
And I said 'oh my god this has just begun'
And it was twelve more hours before it was done
We were up on the rooftop and I'll tell you the truth
I was convinced I'd already fallen off of the roof
And these weird metal things in outer space
Were teleporting me from place to place
The last time I did acid I went insane

So we ran back downstairs where it was better to be
But I was trapped in spiral staircase infinity
And when we got to the door I couldn't go inside
'Cause it was the gates of heaven and I hadn't died
The last time I did acid I went insane

And this kid named Graham he punched a cat in the head
He could read my thoughts, that's what he said
And he described what it was like but I didn't believe it
Like lifting a rug and seeing stars beneath it
Ooo-ooo

And the first rule of tripping was
Don't be with people you don't trust
The second rule of LSD
The rooftop is not a good place to be
The third rule is to be prepared
The fourth rule is to not get scared
The fifth rule is to stay serene
Turn off your mind and float downstream
The sixth rule's to have a good friend at hand
The seventh rule, I hope that you understand
Is not to look to deep into your soul
Or you might find a hideous, hopeless hole
Of hatred, hunger, infinite, idiot
Mindless, meaningless, nothingness, nothingness
Nothingness, nothingness, nothingness, nothingness
Nothingness, nothingness, nothingness, nothingness
Nothingness
And that's what I did

And every aspect of life that I selected
Was instantly and brutally dissected
I saw the horrible emptiness within
The reasons behind everything
And it was at that moment that I went insane
Track Name: The Man With the Golden Arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm

He told me his arm was golden
He told me it was made out of gold
He told me he had a beautiful wife
He lied to me

He told me he had a dog named Lassie
That was true
He told me I had a beautiful wife
That was true

I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm

They warned me
They said he had a golden arm
They lied to me
I said I was not worried
I knew it was just made of silver
I lied to me

He said I had a beautiful wife
He said he really liked my wife
He said they had a real good time together
She told me nothing even happened

I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm

He told me I had a beautiful wife
He told me they had a real good time together
She told me nothing even happened
She lied to me

She couldn't even see me
She couldn't even talk to me
She lied to me
She lied

She said I was nothing
She said I could not compare
She said my arm was made out of shit
She said I was nothing compared with

I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm
I'm talkin' 'bout the man with the golden arm

He lied to me
She lied to me
I lied to me

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/the_man_with_the_golden_arm_lyrics_jeffrey_lewis.html
All about Jeffrey Lewis: http://www.musictory.com/music/Jeffrey+Lewis